


Just a bad dream, Poppins

by randomcactaceae



Category: The Haunting of Bly Manor (TV)
Genre: Angst, Domestic Fluff, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/F, Fluff and Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Soft Jamie, dani comforts jamie, dani x jamie, tw anxiety
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-18
Updated: 2021-01-18
Packaged: 2021-03-16 22:14:14
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,458
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28838361
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/randomcactaceae/pseuds/randomcactaceae
Summary: Jamie has a hard night's sleep due to an episode of overwhelming thoughts. It's been a while since she'd been like this. The other times, she would cry and she would scream. But now that she doesn't live alone anymore, she finds the situation hard to manage. Until Dani wakes up.(tw: anxiety crisis). One-shot.  Hurt/comfort and some fluff (kinda).
Relationships: Dani Clayton & Jamie, Dani Clayton/Jamie
Comments: 7
Kudos: 60





	Just a bad dream, Poppins

It was one of those nights again. The memories and thoughts came pouring down, hurting like knives as usual. Even though with the years she learned to let them go and get out of that horrible loop, sometimes it was just as hard as when she was younger. The words replayed on her head once again, as if it was a movie:

_“If you keep pushing people away you´ll never make it”_

_“How do you expect to share your life with someone if you can't even maintain a relationship?”_

_“Are you like this because of your mom?”_

_“Bloody homeless prison girl”_

_“It's all your fault”_

She knew this wasn't real anymore, and it wasn't right. But sometimes anxiety stabbed herself in the back. _I have no one. Everyone in my life is just there for pity. I'm sure I could disappear one day and no one will fucking notice. No one will care. I'm so stupid. Even Dani is just here because she doesn't know how to get rid of me. Maybe she doesn't even love me the way I think she does. And all because of what? Because I'm boring. Because I have no great story to tell. Because I'm not as interesting as the other ones. Maybe if I had run away earlier. Maybe if I had just been more careful with Mikey. If I had been the perfect little girl they wanted me to be._

Jamie couldn't bear to be alone with her thoughts this time. She knew it wouldn't be the best decision. She turned around and saw Dani peacefully sleeping beside her, with her arm wrapped around her waist, holding her close. She didn't want to wake her up, so she carefully slid out of her arm and rolled out of bed, and slowly walked to the kitchen. She could feel the tension on every inch of her body. It had been a while since she felt like this. Years, to be honest. The last time she recalled she had a crisis like this one was on the first days she worked at the manor.

She crossed the small hall of their flat and went into the kitchen. She turned the light on, reached for a teacup with her shaky hands, and made herself some tea. She reclined on the counter, tapping her feet and biting her nails while her tea was done. Maybe that would calm her down. As she was waiting, her mind was still attacking her with those horrible thoughts, mixed with scenes from her childhood she wasn't happy to recall. She wanted to scream, as she used to when she had a crisis when she lived alone. But she didn´t want Dani to wake up and get worried. So she kept it all to herself once more.

When her tea was done, she poured some on the teacup, turned the lights off and headed to the living room. She sat on the couch, drank some tea, and curled up in a ball, wrapping her legs against her chest. But the thoughts were still there. The pain was still there. She couldn't help it anymore. She suddenly started to cry, regretting every single mistake she had made and recalling every flaw she had. Her crying was filled with sadness, but also with regret and rage. And that rage that felt was to no other but herself. She pressed her legs harder against her chest and leaned her head on her knees. It was going to be a tough night for her.

* * *

Dani suddenly woke up and checked the time. It was 2:15 A.M. She extended her arm to find Jamie's body, as she did every time she woke up; but was surprised she wasn't near. She turned on the lamp in her nightstand and saw the empty space beside her. _Maybe she went to the bathroom or to the kitchen for some water,_ she thought. Jamie sometimes had trouble sleeping and woke up several times, Dani knew that. She sat on the bed, waiting for her to come back, but to her surprise, she didn't. She stood up, concerned, and put on her slippers. She walked to the kitchen and saw that the lights were off. She turned them on and spotted a teapot on the counter.

"Jamie?”

She went out of the kitchen and headed to their living room. The lights were off. There she saw Jamie, quietly sobbing, curled up in a ball, facing the couch. She gentlywalked towards her and placed a hand on her shoulder.

”Are you okay, Jay? What's wrong?”

Jamie was still sobbing but slowly turned her head to see Dani standing beside her. Her jaw was still clenched and her muscles felt stiff. She somehow felt embarrassed about Dani seeing her like that.

 _"_ It's nothing, really"

"Well you don't look like nothing"

Dani gazed at her green eyes, which were now swollen. 

"Just a bad dream, Poppins" Jamie answered, trying not to worry Dani. 

"Wanna talk about it?" 

Dani said as she sat beside her and gently rubbed her back. Jamie started sobbing again.

"It's been a while since the last time it happened. I guess I'll never get rid of it. It's like something in my head just brings that shit up again and I feel wrong. I feel everything I do is wrong, every past decision, everything that I _am,_ and it, it gets loud sometimes, y'know? And I can't stop. It haunts me at night, just like when you- when you see her”

Dani grabbed her hands in hers and stared into her eyes.

" Jamie, I didn't know that. I know it's hard, but remember you are not whatever your thoughts say you are. You are much more than that. I know it, and you should know it too."

Jamie looked down. She wasn't used to being this vulnerable with someone.

"I'm with you. It's all going to be okay ." 

Dani said and kissed her forehead. Jamie slowly started wrapping her arms around Dani as her muscles unstiffened. 

"Come here, baby"

Dani said and gestured for Jamie to sit on her lap. Jamie positioned herself so that Dani was carrying her like a baby, holding her back in one arm and her legs in the other. Jamie placed her arms around Dani's neck and buried her face in her neck. They stayed quiet for a while, until Jamie, finally calmed down, was the one who broke the silence.

"So are you going to stay here? It's cold, y'know? Won't you mind freezing?"

"I won't mind. As long as I'm with you, that's okay" Dani smiled and kissed her forehead again. Jamie smiled back, feeling the soft touch of her lips. Then she placed her head in Dani's chest.

"Do you hear my heartbeat?" Dani asked. Jamie just nodded.

"Well, just focus on that, okay?" she said as she caressed her cheek before wrapping her arms around her once more. They stayed silent for a while.

* * *

"Are you better now?" Dani asked after a while, still holding her close.

"Yeah, I guess so"

"Want me to read to you? You know, my mom used to do that whenever I couldn't sleep. Way before my dad left, of course"

Jamie nodded with a smile. No one had ever taken care of her like this before. She felt warm.

Dani reached out for her book on the table. Jamie untangled herself from Dani and stretched her arm to turn on the lamp. She then curled up against Dani again. Dani held the book open and started reading the first page. Jamie rested her head against Dani's shoulder and then wrapped her arms around her neck. Dani managed to hold the book in one hand, and with the other one, she started to slowly run her fingers through Jamie's hair as she read. Jamie occasionally pressed her lips against Dani's neck and gave her a small kiss, which only made Dani giggle while she was reading.

Dani kept on reading and stroking Jamie's curly hair for a while. After some time, she stopped reading and looked down just to notice Jamie was fully asleep in her arms. She then carefully closed the book and placed on the table in front of her, and then proceeded to wrap her now free arm around Jamie. With her other hand, she kept running her fingers through her hair. She didn't even try to turn the lamp off, as she didn't want to wake her up. She planted a small kiss on top of Jamie's head, which was still on her shoulder, and then rested her own head on top of it. She closed her eyes until both of them were fast asleep.

  
  
  


**Author's Note:**

> Well, I hope you liked it! I'm oficially in love with Dani looking after a hurt Jamie, so I'm planning on writing more soft fics about them. Also, I tried to represent what an anxiety crisis feels like (well, at least for me, as I know there are so many other ways).  
> Please let me know what you think about it, if it's shite or if there's something wrong. Any type of comments are well-received!!. Remember I´m also receiving prompts on Tumblr or here (Tumblr user is also randomcactaceae, if you ever wanna drop a prompt, ask, or have a talk).  
>  Thanks for reading! :)  
> 


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